Stalking: The Forbidden Jutsu
by Fallen to Earth
Summary: Kakashi gets driven to teach his students a forbidden jutsu! What happens when the team try to complete the mission they were given? And who knew that the Ramen shop was a little different once the sun goes down? Read to find out!
1. Gai Enters

**Stalking: The Forbidden Jutsu**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, I wouldn't want too. He's too annoying.**

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"YOSH! My eternal rival! I see you're still teaching your students the same old tricks!" Gai proclaimed as he strode over to Kakashi and his students. If this was any normal day, Kakashi would have had his book out the moment he sensed the youthfulness of his nemesis. Instead of his usual non-caring reply Kakashi snapped.

"My students are none of your business Gai." Well I guess not _snapped_ per say, but for Kakashi, even acknowledging Gai was a rare sight. "I deal with my students the honorable way and-"

"YOU MEAN WE COULD BE LEARNING MORE?!" Naruto exclaimed, "YOU ARE SO LAZY!

"You expected more from the sensai who hardly even arrives for training?" Sasuke muttered.

"HA! I SEE EVEN YOUR STUDENTS ARE TIRED OF YOU KAKASHI, TIRED OF YOU AND YOUR EFFORTLESS COOL!" Gai proclaimed.

"Well then, it appears that I'm a little out of touch. So tell me Gai, what is it that you are teaching your students?" Regularly this information would never be released to a rival team, but Gai was too enthusiastic about actually having the upper hand on Kakashi to notice.

Leaning in close to Kakashi, Gai whispered, or more like yelled into his opponent's ear, "Tenten and Neji are not learning anything overly special at this time, but my most youthful student, Lee is learning a… a forbidden jutsu."

"You do realize the information you have just given me is enough to get you thrown out of Konoha, right?"

"GAH!" Gai jumped back startled, "YOU MAY HAVE WON THIS ROUND KAKASHI, BUT YOU WAIT!" With a single finger pointing at Kakashi's head, Gai disappeared.


	2. They fell for it!

**Disclaimer: Own Naruto I do not. Obsess over Naruto I do.**

"So is Gai-sensai actually teaching his students a forbidden jutsu, sensai?Sakura asked.

"I honestly don't know Sakura, knowing Gai, he could be doing anything." Kakashi shuddered at the thought.

"WELL LET'S GET TO IT! I WANNA LEARN A NEW JUTSU TOO! BELIEVE IT!" Naruto hollered. Kakashi sighed. This is exactly what he was afraid of. He knew that his team was too ambitious to be content with regular jutsus and standard training exercises. They wanted something that they could show off to the world. Kakashi thought for a moment, '_what could I teach them to make them believe it's a forbidden jutsu, when really it's just a regular technique?_'

"So you want to learn something extraordinary, huh? Well so be it. I have a special jutsu that will prove to everyone that you guys are the best of the best." Kakashi smirked under his mask. '_They're eating this up_. _Even Sakuke is taking an interest_.' Sasuke slowly stood from beneath a large tree, his eyes blazing with interest. '_Of course Sakuke would want to be an exceptional Shinobi, if that's what it takes for him to beat his brother.' _

"-en people will stop disrespecting me. They'll treat me like I'm somebody, somebody important! OUCH!" Naruto yelled as Sakura hit him over the head.

"EVERYONE IN KONOHA HAS HEARD YOUR STUPID SPEECH ABOUT BEING HOKAGE ONE DAY! I AM TIRED OF HEARING YOUR DUMB VOICE!" The two Genin started wrestling on the ground. Kakashi sighed again. The two children could not get along. Sometimes Kakashi felt more like a babysitter and less like an elite trainer.

"Okay, I've got it, everyone please have a seat." Kakashi motioned to the ground in front of him. Taking a seat, the three young ninjas prepared themselves for the information they were about to be given. "It seems to me that you three are very adept at offensive and defensive jutsus, but when it comes to tactful and informative jutsus, you guys suck."

"Hey-," Naruto managed before Sakura hit him again.

"I don't like to admit it, but my team knows nothing about spying and gathering information. That's why I'm going to teach you a very special jutsu, the art of following or observing a person persistently.

"Um… sensai, isn't that what people call um… stalking?" Sakura stammered.

"You are absolutely correct Sakura! There are very few shinobi that have mastered the skill of artfully following someone until they go crazy, including me. That is why I am passing this skill onto you, in hopes that you will learn it better than me." Kakashi grinned at them through his mask. He didn't actually think the students would buy it. He just hoped to embarrass them. '_Well I suppose the joke is up._' "Okay students-"

"THAT IS TOTALLY SWEET! AWESOME SENSAI, WHY COULDN'T YOU HAVE TOLD US ABOUT THIS EARLIER?" Naruto was practically hyperventilating from excitement. The joke wasn't up. The three hadn't realized that Kakashi was completely kidding when he revealed the "secret jutsu". Kakashi walked over to a tree, and began beating his head against it repetitively.

"Stupid, little-"

"Um… sensai… aren't you gonna teach-"

"Dumb, brats-"

"Hello? Are you alright-"

"GAH!" Clutching his head Kakashi stumbled back towards his students. "Alright, let's begin." '_This is going to be fun_.'


	3. Mission Failed

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto although everything you read from this page I do! (whoot!)**

"So what exactly are we doing here sensai?" Sakura asked.

"Shh."

"Is this going to help us with the jutsu?" Naruto asked.

"Shh." A couple of seconds passed by and everyone turned to Sasuke who was supposed be the next one to ask a question.

"What? I don't want to get shushed-"

"SHH!" Slumping down into the grass the three ninjas tried to figure out why they were watching Asuma-sensai's team train. All of the sudden Sakura slumped over, apparently unconscious. "Sakura? What on earth are you doing?" Kakashi whispered. He poked her shoulder a couple of times, and then sighed. '_Why do these things always happen to my team?' _ He stretched, stood, and then walked into the clearing. As he did Sakura cracked her neck, peered up from under her bangs and giggled.

"What are you people trying to do? Am I that attractive that your whole team follows mine?" Sakura laughed.

"Um… Sakura are you okay?" Naruto looked at her strangely. Sakuke just slumped.

"That isn't Sakura, its Ino. She used her mind-transfer jutsu on Sakura." Sakuke explained.

"Ha, I knew Sasuke was too smart to believe that this was still Sakura. Before I let her go, tell me what you guys are doing here?" Sakura/Ino inquired.

"WE'RE LEARNING A- OUCH!" Naruto began before getting clubbed by Sakuke. "Um I mean… we were just… OUCH!"

"Do you want her to know ALL of our secrets, Naruto?" Sakuke growled. Before Naruto could retort, Sakura/Ino slumped back into the unconscious position. "There, now she's gone."

In the clearing, Kakashi was crouched over Ino's unconscious body. He was flicking her forehead saying, "come back, and leave Sakura alone, Ino, Innooo." She started to stir.

"WHOA! WHAT THE HECK!" She shouted scooting backwards. "Hehe, um… hi Kakashi-sensai, I was just… um…"

"Yea, spare your excuses, it's alright. My students should have been quieter." Kakashi explained shooting a glare at the three who were slowly emerging from the bushes.

Walking over to Kakahsi, Asuma laughed, "What in Konoha are you trying to teach, Kakashi?"

"Oh um… you know… standard infiltrative… stuff…" Kakashi pieced together awkwardly. He didn't want Asuma to ruin the joke. Whipping out his Icha Icha Paradise, Kakashi waved to the other team and dragged his students back into the bushes. Once out of sight and sound he put his book down. "So if that was a real mission, you three would have failed."

"WELL IF YOU HAD TOLD US WHAT THE MISSION WAS, WE WOULD HAVE BEEN QUIET!" Naruto bellowed.

"It wasn't that hard to figure out, following Asuma-sensai's team, watching them from a distance. We were supposed to be stealthy." Sakuke grumbled, "But apparently you guys didn't understand that concept."

"WHO ARE YOU KIDDING, SASUKE? YOU WERE TALKING TOO! I HEARD- YOWCH!" Naruto started before Sakura hit him again.

"I bet Sasuke was going to tell us what we were trying to do. So don't blame him! You were easily the loudest of all of us." Sakura said, batting her eyelashes at Sasuke. Kakashi just smiled under his mask.

'_They still don't get it, this is turning out better than I thought!'_ "So, now you guys see what I'm getting at here let's start another assignment."


	4. The Notebooks

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. (After about 5 chapters I am going to get very annoyed at disclaimers. Though due to the fact I don't want to get sued, I will tolerate them.)**

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"Alright guys!" Kakashi exclaimed, clasping his hands together, "you will now be going on private… uh… semi-missions let's call them."

'_ALIRIGHT, I finally get a chance to show Kakashi-sensai exactly what I can do! BELIEVE IT!' _ Naruto thought.

"Each of you will have exactly 48 hours to complete your assignment."

"So what is it sensai? Nothing too dangerous I hope…" Sakura whined. _'I hope it's something intense, something that really gets my blood rushing!' _Inner Sakura thought. Unlike the others, Sasuke was not thinking of anything in particular at this moment. He was too busy wondering how Kakashi could eat in public without anyone seeing him without his mask on. Luckily for him, the puzzled look on his face was passed off as a look of interest in their assignments.

"DOES IT INVOLVE KICKING SOME SERIOUS BUTT, SENSAI?" Naruto screamed. '_Now that I think about it, I hope it has something to do with ramen… I sure am hungry." _Naruto thought, a trickle of saliva running down his chin.

'_Wow, Naruto has the attention span of a small housecat and possibly the intelligence of one too." _Kakashi thought to himself. He allowed a small chuckle at his student's expense. "Okay, okay, let's start this. I am going to be handing out small notebooks to everyone in just a second here…" Kakashi started, reaching into his vest for the items, "ah, here we go. Now each book has exactly 200 pages, and in two days I expect those pages full."

"What exactly are we supposed to write in them?" Sakura asked.

"I'm getting to that." _'These kids ask too many questions.' _ "You are going to be recording your observations in those books. So pick a person, any person and follow them." Kakashi said with a smile. _'I'll give it a day before they're caught and returned back here. Ha, that'll teach them to be so annoying.' _ Kakashi could just picture the three getting hauled to his door by their ears. Then Kakashi would make them do a number of assorted D ranked missions, and they won't be able to do anything about it. Then finally he could read his book in peace.

"I pick… Shikamaru!" Naruto exclaimed. _'This'll be so easy, all he does is sit around all day, even if he did notice me, he's too lazy to do anything about it!' _Naruto thought with a giggle.

"Okay then," Kakashi said, scribbling the name down on a piece of paper, "who's next?"

"I guess that I'll pick…Ino, she'll go crazy after ten minutes!" Sakura proclaimed. _'Ha take that Ino-pig! You won't be able to stand my intense stalking skills!'_ Inner Sakura thought.

"Okay… Ino…" Kakashi muttered, again scribbling the name down, "and Sasuke?"

"I suppose I'll take someone a bit more challenging… I choose, Gaara, from the village hidden in the sand." Sasuke said defiantly.

"That is a joke, right Sasuke?" Kakashi said with a nervous laugh. _'Does he want to kill get himself killed? Gaara will not tolerate someone watching him…' _Kakashi thought.

"No… I'm serious, I need a challenge after what we've been given these last few days…" Sasuke said. For a whole month, the students had been mowing lawns, picking weeds, cleaning pets, and picking flowers for Iruka's girlfriend, then cleaning up the flowers when they were thrown on the ground, etc. All in all it had not been fun a fun month. "If I am ever expected to become a better ninja, I have to take on tasks that will test my skills." Sasuke explained.

"But Gaara!? You could choose anyone else, ANYONE else. At least pick someone who won't kill you when you're caught." Sakura pleaded, "I don't know if this team could survive without you." She pouted.

"Are you saying that I'm going to get caught, Sakura?" Sasuke said, glaring at his teammate.

"Of course not, but Gaara is a pretty tough opponent." Sakura retorted.

"Alright you two, Sakura, if Sasuke wishes to pursue Gaara, then let him, he should be able to handle it." _'It is only two days, he should be able to cope.' _Kakashi thought, writing down the name. That's right, the name that wrought fear into the hearts of its enemies. the name that made grown men cower at its might! The name that- well it is Gaara for Pete's sake! He's so evil!

Kakashi pulled out his Icha Icha Paradise and began to read. "So what are you two waiting for, Naruto has probably already found his target by now." _ 'Or a ramen stand.'_

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**Note: I have always wondered how Kakashi eats in public with that mask! If anyone else wonders I only have one answer for you. Very Carefully.**


	5. Hinata's Hobby

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. See I'm so tired of disclaimers that I can't even make it seem somewhat witty.**

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After finishing his twelve bowls of ramen, Naruto went of in search of Shikamaru. _'This is so easy! Kakashi-sensai will think I'm an amazing ninja after this! I won't even have to move! Believe it!' _Naruto thought. He walked past the flower store where Ino was helping out her mom. _'Sakura's got it easy too, Ino's just going to be sitting at that counter for the next three hours at least.'_ While Naruto was lost in his thoughts, a small potted plant came flying out of the shop door, grazing Naruto's shoulder. "Hey! What was that for?!" Naruto yelled into the shop.

"That, Naruto, was for spying on my team earlier today. If your sensai hadn't made me come back to my body I'd have known why you were there!" Ino shouted from the counter.

"HA!" Naruto began before a larger pot of cosmos were thrown, hitting him square in the face, "ARG!" Naruto ducked around the wall, holding his face, which was now cut and bleeding slightly. _'Enough messing around, I've got work to do.' _

Several minutes later Naruto found Shikamaru lounging in the shade of a large oak tree. His eyes were closed and his legs stretched out. He was apparently asleep. _'Alright, he's asleep! This'll be a cinch. I'll just jot down how many times he breathes, snores, or rolls over! BELIEVE IT!' _Naruto thought happily. He stretched out behind a patch of bushes, flipped open his notebook and grabbed his pen. After scribbling down Shikamaru's name on the top of the page, he began to observe.

Nara Shikamaru

Scratches leg

Opens eyes lazily

Scratches cheek

Looks around suspiciously

Yawns

Sighs

Arches fingers together '_Wait… why on Earth does he do that?'_

Makes numerous hand-signs…

**Got outsmarted by Shikamaru the great**

**Got caught by the Shadow Possession Jutsu**

**Because Naruto is the biggest loser in all of Konoha**

Unfortunately by this time you realize that Naruto only got to watch Shikamaru for about five minutes before getting taken over by the jutsu, right?

"So Naruto, what should I do to a freaky little spy?" _'Uhh… this is such a drag…' _ "I think that anyone dumb enough to get caught by a SLEEPING ninja should get reported to their sensai, don't you think so?"

"OH NO! YOU CAN'T TELL KAKASHI-SENSAI I WAS CAUGHT! YOU JUST CAN'T!" Naruto begged.

"Oh, you don't want your sensai to know that you're a creep! Watching me sleep like that, it's just weird." Shikamaru said, "Well then I suppose I should give you a punishment of my own."

"So what are you gonna do Shikamaru?" _'Probably fetch him a drink, that lazy jerk.' _Shikamaru just laughed and started to back up. Since Naruto was under the shadow possession jutsu, he too was backing up. After about ten steps Naruto felt his back against a tree. His feet then turned themselves so he was facing the trees, his face just inches from the rough bark. Shikamaru pulled his head back and then snapped his head forward, over and over and over again. Naruto did the exact same thing, but instead of facing the air, he was facing a huge tree.

"OUCH! ARG! STOP THAT! GRR! YOU- OWCH!" Naruto cried out painfully. Blood was beginning to run down his forehead. Finally after about three minutes he was out cold.

"Ha, that'll teach you to mess around with my day off." Shikamaru scoffed at the unconscious heap, "see ya later, loser!"

Naruto awoke several hours later, his head throbbing painfully. "Aw geez, even HE outsmarted me, and he was ASLEEP!" Naruto said to the approaching night. He was about to give up and return to Kakashi-sensai defeated, but something was bothering him. He _sensed_ something.

"You know you're going about this all wrong." A faint feather-like voice said, "you need serious help, Naruto."

"WHO SAID THAT? COME OUT!" Naruto shouted. He was afraid that he lost too much blood and was going crazy, "ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE NOT JUST PART OF MY IMAGINATION?"

"Um… yea… Naruto, you're new to the world of elite stalking, aren't you? Well I can help you with the techniques you need." The voice continued.

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? TALKING DOWN TO ME LIKE YOU'RE SOMEONE SPECIAL? DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM?"

"Of course I do Naruto, I know you better than most people." The voice said, belonging to a figure that was emerging from behind a tree, "you've helped me many times before, so now it's my turn to help you." It was Hinata.

Naruto was blown away, _'HINATA?! How on Earth does she know so much about stalking? She knows me better than most people? What is she talking about.' _ It hit him. "Hinata, I know this is kind of a weird question, but do you stalk me?"

Hinata sweat dropped. _'He didn't know I stalked him? Is he blind or something?'_ "Let's just say I know where you hang out." She said, blushing fiercely.

"Okay, that's kinda weird but whatever floats your boat right? You said that you could help me learn how to stalk?" Naruto asked.

"Yes, I can help you Naruto. But to succeed you will have to follow my every instruction."

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It's amazing how Shikamaru has an IQ of like 200, yet he couldn't think of anything better to do with Naruto! (hehe oops.) 


	6. His Help!

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto (sob!)**

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Sakura was heading over to the flower shop where she knew that Ino would be working that afternoon. _'I'll have to be careful getting in the door, that'll be Ino's only chance to catch me!' _Sakura thought happily. She approached the shop carefully, not making a sound. _'Nah na nanana nah! (Mission Impossible theme)' _though inner Sakura. She threw her back against the side of the building, _'I'm going to need to come up with a killer plan to get through this door.'_

After minutes of looking like a dork pressed up against the wall Sakura had a plan. _'I'll have to make a clone of myself to go in first. I'll then make the clone look like Sasuke. Ino'll go crazy, and get distracted. Then I'll get the clone to walk up to Ino, blocking her sight of the door. If I'm lucky, maybe she'll even faint when he comes close to her. Ha, it's brilliant!' _One minute and numerous hand-signs later, a full-sized Sasuke clone entered the flower shop. Sakura sat back and let her chakra guide it.

"SASUKE! Hi!" Ino shouted, "What brings you here?" _'He's finally going to ask me out! Why else would he be here?' _Ino thought. "Are you looking for something in particular?"

"Hn. No, I was actually coming to talk to you." The clone said.

'_Ha! Take that Ino-pig! Not only will you be driven crazy by my stalking technique, you're going to get your heart crushed!' _Inner Sakura thought, throwing her fist in the air, _'Yeah!'_

"So, Sasuke, what did you want to talk to me about?" Ino asked, "could it possibly be…" She said, her voice trailing.

'_Good, she's good and distracted, I'll go in now!' _Sakura thought.

"You're going to talk to me about what the heck billboard brow is doing, aren't you?" Ino said calmly. Sakura gasped and started to slowly inch out of the door. Ino grabbed her kunai and slashed the clone, making it disappear with a puff. She then threw it at Sakura, who just stood paralyzed as it pinned her collar to the wall. "So, Sakura, you decided to make my evening a little more fun, huh? I suspect all of this has something to do with what you were doing earlier at the training grounds. You're whole team is up to something, right?" Ino asked.

"How'd you see through my plan, Ino-pig?" Sakura said with venom in her voice.

"Oh come on, like Sasuke would even look at me, let alone talk to me! It was easy. Also, your forehead was a dead giveaway." Ino said with a snarl, "Now that you have nowhere to go, please tell me what is going on?" Since Sakura was stuck to the wall, she had no choice but to explain.

"We're SUPPOSED to be stalking our selected targets. That's what Kakashi-sensai was trying to teach us." Sakura explained.

"STALKING, YOU CALL THAT STALKING?" Ino laughed, "That was the most pathetic display of stalking I have ever seen!"

"Like you could do better, Ino!" Sakura challenged.

"Of course, I have had PLENTY of practice stalking Sasuke! You know… You don't want to fail this assignment, do you? Sakura shook her head. "Well then, I suppose I could possibly help you… for a price." Ino said with a mischievous look in her eyes.

"And what might that be?" Sakura said, still straining to get loose.

"You have to take over my shifts all next week, so I have more time to talk to Sasuke." Ino declared.

"YEAH RIGHT! IN YOUR DREAMS, INO-PIG!" Sakura protested.

"Well I suppose I could just turn you in to your sensai… or use my mind-transfer jutsu and make you parade around town in your underwear, your choice." Ino said evilly. Sakura was at loss for words. _'Would Ino really do that? Of course she would… in fact, I think she's looking forward to it.'_

"Fine, I'll take over your shifts."

"Alright then, we're going to need a trainer, someone who knows the ins and outs of stalking." Ino thought for a moment, then it hit her, "Yes, I've got it! Come on, meet me at the bridge by that one pond in about ten minutes, and don't forget a bathing suit!" Ino declared, yanking the kunai holding Sakura from the wall.

"What are you planning, Ino? Who's going to help us?" Sakura shouted at Ino, who was running down the street. _'I suppose I should just do as she says…'_

TEN MINUTES LATER

"Ino, Ino, where are you?" Sakura muttered as she stood feeling rather naked in just a bathing suit. _'That jerk had better show up, if not she's DEAD!' _Inner Sakura thought.

"Oh good, you came!" Ino said rushing up to meet her. Ino was also wearing nothing other than a small bikini swimsuit.

"Um… Ino, what's the point of wearing these? Are we going swimming or something?" Sakura asked suspiciously.

"Ya, of course we are, silly. Now we start here. We pretend we're playing tag, you chase me all the way to the spring. Once we get there, start splashing around and giggling like there's no tomorrow, okay?"

"Ino? Are you okay? What is this all about?" Sakura asked.

"JUST DO IT OKAY! Trust me, we'll find our trainer in no time." So the girls were off, screaming, giggling, splashing, flipping their hair and acting as girly as humanly possible.

'_What is going on? Why do I have to do this? No one's even around.' _Sakura thought.

After about fifteen minutes, Ino stopped, she flipped her hair one last time and nodded. Sakura was overjoyed. She grabbed a towel and sat down on the grass. Ino soon joined. Out of breath and utterly confused, Sakura asked what was really going on. Ino just laughed and said, "All this time you thought we were alone, we weren't. Anytime a pretty girl comes swimming here, someone is sure to follow."

"WHAT?! ARE YOU SAYING THERE'S A PEEKER IS HERE RIGHT NOW!?" Sakura shouted. Ino jumped on her, covering her mouth.

"Shh, you don't want his to know that we know he's here, do we? Now just watch." She made a few signs, "mind-transfer jutsu." Sakura fell to her knees to catch Ino's unconscious body. She heard a small gasp in the bushes. _'So there really was someone watching us.' _Sakura thought. In just moments, Sakura heard a giggle, Ino's laugh. Then the bushes started to stir, and a figure emerged, it was…

"Oh no… you're telling me that HE'S he one going to help us?" Sakura shuddered.

Out of the bushes was none other than Jiraiya… that's right, the Pervy Sage.

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Alright to everyone that reads this, I'm going away this weekend so you'll just have to wait till the next chapter. I'm really sorry. Also the chapters may not be as frequent since I have final exams next week (eek!) 


	7. Teen Angst

**Disclaimer: Still don't own Naruto, although I do own every review sent in, that's right. I keep them.**

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Sasuke had just finished applying his camouflage makeup. He figured he would need to go all the way if he was ever to stalk Gaara without getting killed. He traded his old, dark blue and black outfit for a long green cloak. He surveyed himself in his mirror, thinking, _'Hn. I paid way too much for this. I suppose I look sort of like Shino with this on… hm, weird.'_ He then decided to button the cloak all the way up to his chin. Grabbing a pair of dark sunglasses he completed the look, _'wow, this is pretty cool, I wonder if this is how shadow clones feel…'_ Sasuke was completely distracted, ranting on and on in his head about how he could look like Shino. After a few minutes, Sasuke realized how stupid he looked and nearly threw up with disgust. 

He ditched the cloak and went off in his regular clothes, they suited him more anyways. He couldn't remember the last time he changed his wardrobe. He studied the camouflage designs painted on his face and realized that they too were rather silly. So he took a shower. FINALLY, after all of that Sasuke was ready for what may be the biggest challenge of his life.

Gaara was tired. He had spent the whole day rampaging through villages, murdering, stealing and finding a replacement eye for his brother's dumb puppet. _'If feeling alive is really this much work, count me out.'_ He reached for his kunai and attempted to stab himself. Of course, the sand stopped it. _'Why bother, this whole teen angst this doesn't really work when you can't even hurt yourself.'_ He thought with a sigh. So he sat down on an old bench, giving bad looks to those passing by. _'The last thing I need is for someone to bother me.'_

Sasuke spotted Gaara first. He appeared to be almost out of chakra and generally worn-down. _'Good, this'll make things a little easier.' _Sasuke thought, settling down behind a billboard advertising Icha Icha Paradise, the movie. He grabbed his notebook and pencil and lazily wrote down Gaara's actions. _'Yawns, glares, sighs, glares, scowls, rubs eyes etc. blah blah blah, this guy is boring. Also, I always thought that was eyeliner, apparently not…' _Sasuke thought absently. "Is there anyway I can make this more interesting?" Sasuke whispered.

Gaara was getting restless. He hadn't done anyone damage in over three hours. He hadn't even made fun of his sister's fishnet, or his brother's dollies. _'Life has no meaning…´_ He thought. He went into long, drawn-out flashback sequence, therefore not noticing a shadow jumping from roof to roof.

'_If I just get his attention,' _Sasuke plotted whist jumping, _'he'll go insane trying to find me. That will make this report a little more interesting… But why is he so zoned out? An experienced ninja like him should have noticed long ago. I guess I'll just have to get closer.' _So Sasuke snuck closer, leaping behind, above and shouting comments at the unresponsive Gaara. "WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!" Sasuke shouted at Gaara, veins popping. Gaara was just finishing up his sad, rejected flashback and was slowly fading back into consciousness.

"U-Uchiha?" He muttered, "What do you think you're doing here?"

"Gah! You, you're awake? Well then." Sasuke threw a smoke bomb to the ground, then making a leap behind the billboard once more. He was unprepared for the ninja's sudden awakening. Well at least now Gaara knew he was there.

'_What is that freak thinking? If I hadn't been reminiscing, I would've crushed him, maybe… His Chidori is rather powerful, and I don't feel like washing my clothes tonight.'_

_'Ha, now I can really stir things up!' _Sasuke leapt from the billboard, running and jumping as fast as he could, kicking up dust from around Gaara's feet. _'If I remember correctly, Gaara here is a little bit freaked out by someone faster than his sand.'_ Sasuke brushed up against Gaara, causing him to whip around angrily.

"WHAT DID I DO TO YOU, UCHIHA?!" Gaara yelled starting to panic. He was low on chakra, and an attack now could kill him. Further more, why did Sasuke want to hurt him anyways? They had already settled their differences over a bowl of ramen earlier that week, and their agreement was expected to last at least another month. What had driven Sasuke to do this? Did he too hate Gaara, for unknown reasons, making it harder for Gaara to be accepted? "WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME?" Gaara sat back down on the bench and wiped his eyes, which were getting sand kicked into them.

"There, annoying isn't it Gaara? Sasuke snickered, coming close behind him. _'I'm getting pretty good at this.' _

"What are you trying to do? If you're going to kill me, do it quickly." Gaara whimpered, feeling dejected and pathetic. "And here I thought you understood me…"

"Understood you, what? Oh! About no one loving you and having nobody but yourself to depend on? Yes, I do understand, but instead of sitting there crying about it, I fight! I fight through the pain and loneliness, because one day I'm going to restore my clan and kill my brother!" Sasuke was proud of his speech. He hadn't said that much in weeks.

"You are such an emo." Gaara replied.

"Takes one to know one," Sasuke retorted.

The two glared angrily at each other for a while longer. Garra finally decided to get Sasuke out of his face, so he shoved him back. When he did, Sasuke's notebook fell out of his pocket and onto the ground in front of Gaara. "What's this? Your diary?" Gaara taunted.

"No, no, no give that back!" Sasuke leapt at Gaara, but the sand stopped him, "don't you read that!"

"Yea right! This could be the most interesting thing that's happened all week!" Gaara flipped the book open, his dark eyes scanned the page, taking the information in. "You're stalking me? You might possibly be the most pathetic stalker on the face of the planet, you know that Uchiha?"

"I am not! You were completely freaked out the entire time!" Sasuke pouted.

"No, you were attacking me, stalking is a finer art. You have to be one with your surroundings, you have to be invisible. You were just being annoying." Gaara said.

"Was not."

"Was too."

"WAS NOT!"

"WAS TOO, INFINITY, NOW LISTEN TO ME!"

"Fine."

"It seems to me that you need some help."

"From who? I don't need help."

"Yes you do, believe me, and I can help you."

"You? When have you ever stalked anyone?"

"Well before I became a heartless killer, I stalked a lot of people!" Gaara explained, somewhat offended, "I was the one that drove Tsunade to become a raving drunk, Orochimaru to never get a tan, and your beloved sensai to never show the bottom half of his face. I accomplished all of that from stalking. They all had to be institutionalized for months!" Gaara was glowing with pride.

"Kakashi's mask? Maybe that is an accomplishment… and you could teach me?" Sasuke asked.

Gaara nodded, "I am technically on a killing probation, so… I guess this could distract me. So, yes I will teach you, Uchiha Sasuke!"

_And a partnership was formed, between to angsty teenagers in the village of Konoha._

* * *

_**So, there you go, chapter 7. Phew. So here I decided to portray Gaara as more of a rival to Sasuke than an evil demon child. So don't be mad if you like him the other way, this is fiction, so the characters are how I like them. Also, Gaara is technically from the Sand village, but let's just say he was on vacation in Konoha, okay?**  
_


	8. A Reason To Drink

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

* * *

Sasuke was walking down the street, Gaara leading him down many dark alleys and over rooftops.

"Where are you taking me, to your evil lair? Sasuke growled.

"Just be quiet! I'm taking you to get some help, or else you'll never learn how to stalk!" Gaara shouted back. Sasuke just glared Gaara, trying to act uncaring, but he was blushing. After about ten minutes of running, jumping and climbing, they arrived.

"Hey isn't this the place where Naruto buys ramen all the time?" Sasuke asked.

"Naruto? How should I know?" Gaara replied. _'Idiot.'_ They approached the Ichiraka Ramen house, but instead of going through the front entrance, they went around back.

'_Where is this freak taking me? We have been all around Konoha and then come to a place like this? I bet this is where he stores all the bodies of the people he's killed.' _Sasuke thought, acting rather paranoid. Gaara walked silently to a small slit in the wall and whispered, "Hai! Konoha Raka!" A hidden door swung open. Gaara beckoned Sasuke inside. "Quickly, quickly, we can't have anyone know of this place." Sasuke followed, wary.

They entered a huge room, a hidden portion of the ramen shop. There were numerous booths, all filled with criminals, fellow ninjas and respected ninja. "Geez! There are murders and felons here, why doesn't anyone do anything?!" Sasuke practically shouted. All heads spun around to look at the imbecile who insulted them. "Oh… um, hi everyone… I was just…" Sasuke slunk down into a chair, attempting to hide his embarrassment.

"You know, you really have to work on your people skills." Gaara said, sipping some strange liquid. Sasuke grumbled.

"So how is being in this ridiculous bar going to help me stalk people!?" Sasuke spat.

"Tsk tsk. You don't know me at all, do you?" Gaara said, taking a seat. Gaara turned to face the rest of the bar, "THIS PUNK HERE DOESN'T THINK I KNOW HOW TO STALK!" The whole bar burst into fits of laughter. Sasuke just stared in amazement. Suddenly, the door swung open again, revealing an all too familiar face. It was Tsunade, the Hokage. _'What on Earth is she doing showing her face here again?'_ Gaara thought. The whole room went silent. Tsunade had a dark look on her face, and Shizune was trailing her, passing a large number of bills into Tsunade's outstretched hand. The old man at the counter had huge money signs in his eyes as he prepared the sake. Tsunade took a seat next to Gaara, completely oblivious to his stares. Gaara cleared his throat, "hello, Tsunade, long time no see." He had a devilish grin on his face, and when Tsunade turned to look at him, she practically fainted.

"Yo-you… I thought you were gone…" Tsunade stuttered, eyes wide. _'Oh no… not that kid again… I haven't seen him since…'_

_Flashback_

_Tsunade was walking home from a lecture on the medical potential of chakra. She was tired of these late night presentations, she just wanted to sleep. She was walking down the street when something caught her eye. Out of her peripheral vision was a flash of red. She spun around, searching for the source, but all that remained was a small, fist sized figurine shaped like a gourd. She approached the statue with caution, searching for explosives and whatnot. Her hand reached out to touch it, though when she did it collapsed into a small pile of sand. 'Hmm… how odd,' Strange occurrences weren't uncommon, so she continued on, thinking nothing of it._

_About two blocks later a small boy appeared in an alley to her right. She spun around, thinking she'd finally catch the prankster, but like the first time, nothing remained but a gourd statue. She lashed out at it in anger, but it just turned to sand. Angrily Tsunade stomped down towards her home, making threats to the kid who was behind this. Just as she put her hand on the doorknob, she saw the same kid through the window in her house. She smashed the door open, and sprinted to the window. All that remained were five gourds. They were multiplying. She tried to hit them with a blast of chakra, but they just became sand. _

_Tsunade ran to her bathroom. She rinsed her face, thinking she was crazy. 'I gotta get out of here,' but just as she dried her face off, the boy was there again, behind her with a devilish grin. Tsunade spun around, and she felt her fist collide with something, 'got him, WHAT!' The boy was gone, all that was there was a huge pile of sand. _

_Tsunade ran around her house in a crazed fury, knocking over statue after statue, creating waves and waves of sand. Tsunade just looked at it all then walked over to her kitchen. She took out the large bottle of alcohol, and chugged it. Then she went to her storage closet, and got a bucket and spade._

_End Flashback_

"Have you come back to haunt me, Gaara?" Tsunade said, her lips trembling.

"Ha, don't you worry Tsunade, I'm retired!" Gaara said, and then passed a drink on to her. "I'm going to teach this one here all I know!" He said, slapping Sasuke on the back, making him choke on his food. _'I'm going to figure out what his sensai was planning, teaching them how to stalk. This is going to get interesting.'_

* * *

_**Ha, poor Tsunade. I hope you don't mind I made her a crazy drunk! It's not all that far from the truth. And I apologize for spelling errors... yadeeyada... Thanks for reading! Please review!!**  
_


	9. No More Makeup!

**Disclaimer: I don't know if I'd want to own Naruto, then I wouldn't be able to write fanfics, now would I:3**

* * *

After the reveal of Tsunade's experience with Gaara, Sasuke felt a little more comfortable putting his trust in him.

"So you really did all that?" Sasuke inquired.

"Does it look like she's faking?" Gaara replied, stuffing a dumpling into his mouth. Tsunade was drinking down shots of Sake like there was no tomorrow.

"Er… I guess not." Tsunade slumped over the counter, "is she going to be okay?" Gaara ignored Sasuke and bought himself some more dumplings.

"You see, I'm the best of the best, what more proof do you need?" Gaara said.

"Well…" Sasuke began, before a familiar face came up to them. It was Orochimaru, and he was more than a little bit drunk.

"Hey! Sasuke, long timeee no see, how's it going? Oh, Gaara, greetings, stalk anybody lately?" Orochimaru slurred. Sasuke just inched away slowly. Gaara gave Orochimaru the death glare, since he hadn't gotten around to forgiving him for murdering his father. "Woah, don't give me that look, it was just a question. Oh, have you told himmm about how you messed up that copy-cat ninja?" Orochimaru added, before taking a seat on the opposite side of Sasuke. Sasuke then proceeded to inch away in the other direction.

"Grr… that guy is such a freak…" Gaara grumbled.

"More than you, demon-boy?" Sasuke taunted.

"Do you wanna hear about your sensai, or not?" Gaara said.

"Yes."

"That's it, no begging at my feet, or jumping up and down, just a yes?" Gaara scoffed.

"Just tell the story Gaara."

_Kakashi's Flashback_

_Back when Kakashi was still mask-less, and was a fun-loving teen (yes, I know it's hard to believe) he was a little experimental with his style. He would wear a variety of jumpsuits, in all colors, until Gai started sporting them. He also wore long robes, with extravagant bows, until that too was stolen, by Orochimaru and the Akatsuki. So Kakashi was constantly changing his look. _

_For one unfortunate week, Kakashi decided that face makeup would be a good idea. It wasn't. To give you a visual, it looked somewhere between Kankurou and Kiba. Long purple and blue streaks ran across his face and over his eyes, making him look more like a clown than a ninja. Although it made him stand out, so he liked it. _

_Kakashi was in his bathroom, placing elegant swirls on his cheeks with a purple tube of lipstick when he noticed a small note pinned to his door, it read: 'You know, my sister has the same brand.' Kakashi just scowled. People could never understand his idea of fashion; he wished that someday people would look beyond the face, and into the soul. He was deep that way. So, Kakashi ignored the random comment, throwing it into the trash. _

_About three hours later Kakashi was finished, his face a vision of beauty… well sort of. He turned to exit the bathroom when he saw that the note had mysteriously reappeared on the wall again. Kakashi just gave it a wary look and proceeded out the door. _

_That day Kakashi had a mission, to clean out the park. It was an easy job so he told his teammates to take the day off. After enduring all of the snickers and jeers of the people of Konoha he arrived. He took one look at the park and fainted. It was covered, every square inch, in post-it notes. Each of them had a different comment, such as: 'Hey! My girlfriend wants to know where you get your makeup', or, 'is the circus in town?' or, 'who'd you copy that look from, a mime?' The taunts continued. _

_Kakashi finally woke up and began to clear the park. He was kind of edgy from the discovery, but continued his work nonetheless. He had zipped through half the park when he turned around to survey his progress. There was none. Each and every one of the sticky notes had been replaced, making it look like he'd done nothing for the past three hours. Kakashi fainted, again. _

_When he woke up for the second time, he realized he too, was covered in sticky notes. He couldn't take it, so he ripped off his sock and took out his kunai and cut of the end. He forced the sock over his face and shouted, "THERE, NOW YOU WILL NEVER SEE WHAT I LOOK LIKE!" Needless to say, the villagers took him to therapy for a while afterwards, but Kakashi never showed his face again._

_End Flashback_

"Whoa… That is not bad; I always thought that he had huge fish lips or something." Sasuke said.

Gaara chuckled, "most people do… it would require some serious ninja stalking skills to remove that mask…"

Sasuke thought for a moment, _'would sensai acknowledge my skills if I was able to remove his mask?' _He leaned towards Gaara, "hey, I have an idea…"

* * *

**_Hey, sorry about this chapter, I was kinda at loss for ideas... I guess you all know what's going to happen next! Also I'm going to be working on my other story too, so be patient! Thanks please R&R!!!_**


	10. A Filler Arc

**Disclaimer: (Copy and paste earlier disclaimers here)**

* * *

Not long after the last story, the door opened once again. This time it was Jiraya, followed by Sakura and Ino, who were both wearing nothing but their bathing suits.

"What on Earth? Why aren't you guys wearing _clothes_? It's freezing outside!" Sasuke asked laughing.

Sakura glared, "Does it look like we _like_ wearing these?"

"I do, people seem to recognize me more." Ino said, smiling at a few guys at the table over. Gaara was still finishing off his last plate of food.

When he looked up at the newcomers he said, "What has Jiraya done now?"

"What makes you think I did anything?"

"They are two girls, wearing bikinis, in a bar AND IT'S MIDNIGHT! Maybe it's just me, but I don't think that happens too much around here."

"It would happen a whole lot more if I was in charge of this place! Oh yeah!" Jiraya boasted, ignoring the glares of all the women in the building.

"So, are you going to explain?" Sasuke asked.

Jiraya looked over at Sasuke, rubbing the large bruise Sakura had just given him, "Alright, let's just say we made a negotiation."

"Pfft, you said that if we stayed in these you'd help us be better stalkers!" Sakura explained.

"Okay, calm down." Jiraya took a seat next to Gaara, "have you noticed…" His voice dropping to a whisper. Gaara nodded, stroking his chin thoughtfully.

"So it is true."

"What's true?" Ino and Sakura said in unison.

"You've all been pranked, by Kakashi. What other explanation could there be?"

"You mean, we were set up on this wild goose chase, so he could have a couple days off?" Sasuke growled.

"Yup, and that's why I propose you get him back." Gaara said. Just as he finished laying out the plan, the door opened again. This time it was Hinata leading Naruto by the wrist.

"Ouch, ouch! Hinata stop, you're hurting me!" Naruto yelped, "What happened to the innocent, sweet Hinata? Bring her back, please!" The whole bar burst into fits of laughter. Naruto was puzzled; he looked around, glaring at his enemies. "What's going on here? Why are all these criminals here?" He looked at Sasuke and Sakura, "and WHY AREN'T YOU GUYS STOPPING THEM?"

"Hey squirt, one question at a time," Jiraya began, "First, Hinata is the stalking rookie of the year; she's in her element here. There is no reason for her to be shy. Second, this is kind of like an illegal organization, so we don't turn in our members."

"You know what? Nothing else this week has made sense, so why should this?" Naruto sat down, and ordered some ramen.

Gaara handed Sasuke a list of materials for their ingenious plan. "Hey Sasuke, what's this plan you're going on about?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke went into a flashback of the preceding events. When he was finished Sakura gave him a funny look. "Um, Sasuke, I don't really know the significance of flashbacks, since WE CAN'T SEE THEM."

Orochimaru, who was still half asleep next to Sasuke, sat up. He swiveled his chair and said to Sakura, "You know, I heard that there are some kinds of people that can see flashbacks…"

"Oro! Hey I didn't see you there. So what are you going on about? You know, flashbacks are just used as fillers, there's really no need for them at all." Jiraya explained. The whole bar darkened. Nobody likes fillers.

Sasuke sighed, and then explained every last detail of what had happened in the last hour. By the time he was done, he was rather tired. He had never said so much in one sitting before.

"Hn. So that's it? That's how you're going to get Kakashi to take his mask off? You know, you could just beat it off of him. It'd be faster." Naruto said, shrugging.

"Naruto Uzumaki, have I not taught you anything in these last couple of hours? Stalking is a refined art; you don't just go up and hit the person!" Hinata chastised.

"Um, Hinata you're scaring me… Please go back to your other self," Naruto curled into the fetal position, "please…"

"Yea… you're scaring me as well." Sakura added, still in her bathing suit. Naruto just noticed this, and was staring at her from his seat on the floor. "Naruto! Are you ogling me?" She gasped, whacking him over the head.

"Hn… noo…" Naruto mumbled, almost unconscious.

"Alright, everyone know the plan? It's time for operation Payback!" Sasuke announced.


	11. Operation Payback: Phase 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, or any of the drastically changed characters that are appearing in this chapter.**

* * *

The ninjas were all stationed around Kakashi's apartment. Their headsets were fully operational and they had gone over the plan a million times. The only problem was that Naruto still thought it was bogus. 

"Just go take it off! How hard could it be?" Naruto pouted.

"That won't prove anything, baka!" Sakura said.

"…forced…evil Hinata…dumb plan…" Naruto grumbled.

"Naruto, listen to me. If you mess this up, you. Are. Dead." Gaara explained, gripping the front of Naruto's jumpsuit. Naruto sighed and grabbed his headset.

Sasuke jumped on an old stump, surveying his team. "Okay, today at o'five hundred hours we strike!"

"First Hinata becomes all confident and bossy, then Sasuke starts talking to people, what is going on?" Naruto said to himself, "maybe I should turn all dark and moody, see what Sasuke thinks then."

"NARUTO! You are ignoring the pep-talk! Do you want this to work or not?" Hinata said, clubbing Naruto over the head, "Oh my gosh, Naruto. Did that hurt? I didn't mean it, I'm so sorry!"

"Oh no, Hinata's getting all shy again. I guess it's because morning is coming." Gaara said.

"Well we had better hurry then. Besides, I happen to know that a bunch of girls are throwing a party in the apartment over!" Said Jiraya.

'_This is such a waste of time… wow, I sound like Shikamaru. I'm so glad Sasuke is in charge of all this, he is so hot.' _Ino thought, smiling.

"Alright everyone, get to your stations!" Sasuke declared.

**Ten minutes later**

Kakashi was just starting to wake up. The sun was just starting to peek over the horizon. _'Not another day…'_ Kakashi thought. _'Wait… Today those kids are still working on their assignments. I get the whole day to myself!'_ Kakashi was thrilled. He rolled off his bed double checking that his mask was still on.

"Good morning Kakashi."

Kakashi whipped around. "Who said that?" His room was empty, his window open and curtains blowing softly in the wind. He scratched his head, "…anyone there?" _'Oh boy, I really do need a vacation.'_

**Outside**

Outside Hinata was scaling down the wall. _'That was way to close for comfort.' _She had been on Kakashi's roof when he woke up. If he hadn't rolled over, she would have been caught for sure. She hardly had enough time to finish her part of the mission. Now all she had to do was wait.

"ARGGG!"

Hinata giggled. Apparently her little prank was a success. Kakashi was bent over his Icha Icha Paradise with a horrified look on his face. Concealed in the pages were numerous post-it notes, all mocking his mask.

**Kakashi's House**

"It's happening again… I just know it," Kakashi was muttering himself, pacing his room. He smacked his forehead against his doorframe, taking a deep breath. He turned back to the book, and gasped. All of the notes were gone. "Illusions? Whose sick idea of a joke is this?"

Kakashi just put the book away in his pocket and left the room. He opened the door and… _whoosh_. Naruto shot a fist out at his sensai. Of course it was easily dodged and Naruto ended up on a collision course with the ground… from Kakashi's window.

"WHAT ON EARTH NARUTO?" Kakashi shouted down at the mangled ninja smashed into the pavement. Naruto just twitched, and then groaned out in pain. "I take it that your mission didn't work out so well!" Kakashi turned and went to grab himself some breakfast.

**Outside**

"You actually tried to punch him," Hinata was shaking her head at the foolish Naruto.

"Didn't I say I was GOING TO KILL YOU if you messed this up?" Gaara growled, "You're lucky he didn't suspect much."

Naruto just sat there, pouting at the two ninjas. "So what are you gonna do to me?"

"Lucky for you, you still have one more role in this plot, so you will not be hurt, yet."

**Inside**

Sasuke was ready with the cameras. He was going to catch Kakashi without his mask on. Kakashi was preparing some quick toast, taking his sweet time. Sasuke pressed up tight against the wall in the next room. _'Oh I hope he doesn't decide to come in here…'_ Finally, the toast was made.

Sasuke's finger tightened on the remote, he had ten cameras all perfectly positioned, there was no way he could fail. Kakashi sat down at the counter, grabbed a piece of toast and… and… nothing. He stood up, and walked back into his room, and stuck his head out of the window.

**Outside**

"Alright, alright… I'll play my stupid part." Naruto agreed reluctantly, "but really, couldn't we be actually TRAINING INSTEAD OF TRYING TO TAKE SENSAI'S MASK OFF?!"

Both Hinata and Gaara made a dive for Naruto. They covered his mouth and rolled into nearby bushes. Not ten seconds later Kakashi poked his head out of the window suspiciously. Naruto had almost ruined their plan for the second time.

Gaara was furious. He took out a small book from his pocket and scribbled down Naruto's name.

"Mmuf ssatt?" Naruto mumbled, his mouth still covered. Hinata released him. "I said, what's that?"

"Oh not much, just my list of people to kill."

Naruto shut up and walked quietly to his next post.

**Inside**

Kakashi returned to his breakfast, finally going to eat. As he raised his hand to lower his mask, Sasuke took a deep breath in and… pressed the button. There was a small click as all ten cameras went off simultaneously. Sasuke was overjoyed; he may have just gotten the pictures!

He poked his head around the corner to get a better look. Kakashi's face was covered, by non other than his Icha Icha book. The pictures were ruined. _'And this is why we have plan B.'_ Sasuke ran to the window, and jumped out, joining his comrades.

* * *

**_Note: I'm going away for two weeks (eek! I know) Really sorry, it's summer school, can't do much about it! Although if it turns out that I have a spare moment or two, I'll try to slip in a chapter! Lots of love to my faithful readers and to all those who review!_**


	12. Phase 2

**Disclaimer: I have just come to the realization that I probably don't even own this story. I bet someone else has already thought about this and is writing a threatening flame right this moment... Either way I don't own Naruto.**

* * *

Sasuke sat outside, cursing his foolishness. "…stupid cameras, how could I have underestimated Kakashi?"

"Easy, you're a bonehead." Naruto said.

"Right, and you're the one with the face SQUASHED FROM THE PAVEMENT!" Sasuke bellowed.

"Um… Sasuke-kun… Could we… um, get the next part into action here? I think that sensei's almost finished eating." Sakura whispered.

Jiraya, who was in the apartment next door, came up to the group, holding what appeared to be a huge stack of…post-it notes.

"Er… you don't think that he's gotten used to the whole 'post-it note' torture yet?" Gaara asked.

"No, no. We're only going to need one. I also have a," He pulled out another stack of something, "few mirrors!"

"So you weren't just peeking on girls? You were collecting mirrors?" Naruto asked.

"Tsk. You young people have no respect. I have devised an amazing plan that will blow your minds!"

Sasuke walked over, not liking that he had been left out of the conversation. "What about the plan we already have?"

"Screw that, this one is so much better."

"Fine."

The group ran off to the memorial, to plant their note.

**Kakashi**

Kakashi had just finished his breakfast, foiled another plot to catch him without his mask and was ready to spend a glorious day doing nothing. He only had one thing left to do, pay tribute to his dearly departed friends.

Upon arriving at the memorial, he noticed something odd. There was a note. He shuddered, a post-it note. He snatched it up; making sure it was real this time. It read: _To my devoted reader, a sneak peek into the next Icha Icha book located at the bath house. Be there at 8:00 a.m. sharp! – Jiraya_

Kakashi almost jumped with glee. _'Another Icha Icha, this really is a good day!'_ He paid his respects and ran to the bath house. There was no way he was going to be late.

**Bath House**

"Okay, everyone… er… um…" Hinata tried to begin.

"It's okay Hinata, I'll take it from here." Ino jumped up front, actually wanting a role in this plot, "it seems that if we really mess with his head first, it'll make the taking off his mask much easier, right? So we have positioned the mirrors all around, kind of like a fun house. There will be one post-it note positioned so its image is in all the mirrors. Kakashi will go nuts trying to find it. Then we'll open up the door to the bath and put up an illusion covering the water. He should walk right in, completely disoriented. There we will ambush him with clones and cameras and… BAM! We've got him!"

Sasuke shuddered, "you know… that is going to seem like the mangekyo sharingan you know. It'll be like Itachi's attacking him."

"Ha, well it won't be because Itachi's probably slaughtering some other helpless village right now!" Naruto taunted.

Sasuke leapt on him, "YOU TAKE THAT BACK YOU LITTLE RAT!"

"Hey you two, stop! Kakashi's coming!" Gaara said.

"You're kidding right? It's only 7:30, he shouldn't even think about coming for another three hours at least!" Sakura remarked.

"It's my book after all, of course he's eager!" Said Jiraya proudly.

"Places everyone!"

Kakashi climbed the steps to the bath house. _'Where is everyone, I'm not the only one who got the invitation, am I?'_

"Hello? Is anyone there? Jiraya?"

"Er… um… Come on in, we're in the back!"

Kakashi opened the door. It was pitch black inside, there appeared to be a large amount of candles randomly positioned around the room. _'Wow, are they ever being fancy!'_ He proceeded to the center, where he thought he could almost see a book lying on the table.

"Halt! You're time has come Kakashi!" A mysterious voice boomed.

"Who's there? What is the meaning of this?" Kakashi spun around wildly, lifting his headband to reveal his sharingan.

Without warning the candles went out, leaving Kakashi in darkness. For a few brief seconds he stood his ground. Then… a dim light went on. He was in what appeared to be a crude fun house.

He glanced around, searching for the exit. It appeared to have been covered with mirrors as well. From the depths of each mirror, a shape appeared. It was a note. Kakashi whimpered as it bounced and swirled around the room. From every angle he could read: _Catch me if you can, copy-cat! _

'_Alright, if these are mirrors… then all I have to do is find the original.'_

Kakashi burst forward, scratching along every mirror in search of the note. Seconds seemed like minutes and minutes seemed like hours to the crazed ninja.

"GET ME OUTTA HERE!"

Suddenly he had a revelation. _'What if this is an enemy attack, not some cruel prank? Yea, that's right. I bet this is the mangekyo jutsu! We're all under attack, duck and cover!'_ Kakashi fell into the fetal position, covering his head in his arms.

"We're coming Obito, hang in there buddy!" Kakashi started to talk to himself.

**Behind the mirrors**

"I think he's had enough, don't you Sasuke?" Ino asked.

"Yup, time to let him out."

Out of nowhere, the note seemed to materialize directly in front of Kakashi. He poked his head up and glared at it. "DON'T YOU TAUNT ME YOU FILTHY PIECE OF PAPER!" He leaped up, trying to grab the note. He followed it as it led him outside and over the bath.

Just as he was about to step into the scalding water, the illusion faltered. The water re-materialized and the note disappeared. Naruto was sitting in the water with ten of his clones. They were poised ready to attack the moment Kakashi hit the water.

Kakashi stopped, he looked around and smiled. He unzipped his vest and soon was standing in… his bathing suit. The plan was ruined.

Kakashi took a running leap and cannonball-ed into the water. It took him only three seconds to demolish the clones and throw Naruto out of the water.

"So… what have we learnt about trying to attack your sensei?

Sasuke stepped out, flabbergasted, "How did you know?"

"Well I happen to know that the next Icha Icha book won't come out for another eight months, so that was a sure giveaway. Oh yea, and Naruto's hair was sticking out over top of one of the mirrors in there." Kakashi smiled and continued swimming around.

Sasuke slowly turned a dark red color, his eyes revealed the sharingan and his teeth were barred, "Naruto Uzumaki… YOU ARE DEAD!" And he ran off after a screaming Naruto.

"So, sensei… you were just pretending this whole time?" Sakura asked.

"Hahaha, yes I was. One of the many challenges Gai and I had was to get the starring role in a movie. It required months of acting classes."

The rest of the group just sighed and disbanded. Their fun was over.

"Hey, Hinata! I was just wondering what you were doing tonight?" Asked Gaara, running up to the ninja.

Hinata giggled evilly, "what do you think I'm going to be doing?"

Gaara slung his arm around her back; they had already begun to choose their next vicim.

The End

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_**I hope you all liked my first fanfic. More to come I'm sure. Please review! Thanks a lot!**_


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